1.修改前:Solving trivial problems in the dorm will add your social experience and help you to understand other people’s feelings and learn to be kind.
修改后:Solving trivial problems in the dorm will enrich your social experience and help you to understand other people’s feelings and learn to be considerate.
解析:
句子中所使用的“add”,“kind”这两个词语的表达含义都比较宽泛。“add”既可以指数量上的增加,也可以指程度的加强,如果要表达“丰富经验、增加知识”这个意思的时候,用enrich会使表达更准确。“kind”这个词,它从字面意义上讲是“好的、善良的”,但却不能很具体的表现一个人的性格到底“好在哪”,而原句中是想表达的是“考虑周到、体贴入微”的特点,所有需要使用更准确的词,应当使用 “considerate”。
2.修改前:Science and technology have greatly influenced our lives and our society is changing very rapidly.
修改后:Science and technology have come to pervade every aspect of our lives and, as a result, society is changing at a speed which is quite unprecedented.
解析:
经过第一题的分析,大家应该也了解了“greatly”,“rapidly”属于常用词,表示程度高、速度快,这样的词在表达效果上缺乏说服力,就像大家看文章希望能看到的是实实在在的干货,用了“pervade every aspect of our lives”就具体生动地表现出科技的影响力到底有多大,其影响力已渗透到我们生活的方方面面,“at a speed which is quite unprecedented”意为“以一种前所未有的速度”,形象地道出了变化速度之快。
3.修改前:Young people tend to think that real life is as nice and interesting as it is in the novels and movies, while more experienced adults think this kind of naive daydream will only be destroyed by later experiences and everyone should learn to get used to common everyday life.
修改后:Young people tend to think that real life is as dramatic and fascinating as it is in the novels and movies, while more experienced adults think this kind of naive daydream will only be destroyed by later experiences and everyone should learn to get used to tedious everyday life.
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