英语短笑话

笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一

When they’re together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem one Saturday, I put my foot down “All right, you two,” I said sternly “No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting”

As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, “C’mon, Steven, let’s get dirty ”

我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。一个星期六，我开始抗议了。“好啦，你们两个，”我严厉地说，“不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许扯淡，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。” 我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。”

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二

It’s Good to Admit a Fault

John is not a “good” student He always sleeps in the class Today he sleeps again

“John!” Teacher says angrily

“What What’s wrong” John is awaken

“Why do you make a face It’s classroom Look! Everyone is laughing” Teacher says

“No one is laughing” The others murmured

“No, it’s not me I was not making a face I was sleeping” John fells upset

“Um Not bad You can admit your fault You are still a good boy” Teacher is satisfied with it

认错

约翰并不是个“好”学生。他总是在上课的时候睡觉。今天他又睡着了。

“约翰!”老师生气地喊他。

“什么出什么事了”约翰醒了。

“你为什么要做鬼脸这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”老师生气地说。

“没有人在笑呀。”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。

“不，不是我。我没有做鬼脸。刚才我睡着了。”约翰感到不安。

“嗯，还不错。你承认自己的错误，还是给好孩子”老师为此感到满意。

简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三

Mark is a good boy,but he is not very cleanHis face and hands always very dirty

One day,Mark goes to schoolHis teacher looks at him and says:"Mark,I know what you eat today""What"Mark asks "Eggsyour face and your mouth tell me that"

"No"Mark says,"not today,but the day before yesterday"

翻译：马克是个好男孩，但他不是很干净。他的手和脸总是很脏。

一天，马克去学校。他的老师看着他，说：“我知道你今天早上吃了什么。”“什么”马克问道。“鸡蛋。你的脸和嘴告诉了我。”“不，”马克说，“不是今天，是前天。”

1、按猪的审美观，我基本算得上是个帅哥。

2、不在课堂上沉睡，就在酒桌上埋醉。

3、见到我以后你会突然发现——原来帅也可以这样具体呀！

4、自从两个菜鸡自称是某名牌大学的毕业生后，我现在一般都自称文盲！

5、午夜十二点准时下线，否则公主就会变回灰姑娘。

6、坐拥大奶名号，享受二奶待遇！

7、下雨了，别忘了打伞，湿身是小，淋病就麻烦啦！

8、脱了衣服我是禽兽，穿上衣服我是衣冠禽兽！

9、自打我变成了一泡屎，就再也没有人敢踩在我头顶上啦。

10、你的丑和你的脸没有关系……

11、想污染一个地方有两种方法：垃圾，或是钞票！

12、08年8月8号结婚是个不错的主意。

13、长得真有创意，活得真有勇气！

14、动物的种类在减少，人的种类在增加吗？

15、你可以像猪一样的生活，但你永远都不能像猪那样快乐！

16、日出只要在日落前出现就好，上课只要在下课前到达就好。

17、人总要犯错误的，否则正确之路人满为患。

18、啥时硬件也可以COPY就好了!

19、我喝水只喝纯净水，牛奶只喝纯牛奶，所以我很单纯……

20、为配合今年中国计划生育工作的胜利完成，本人决定暂时不和异性朋友接触，谢谢合作。

21、没有钱，没有权，再不对你好点，你能跟我？

22、买了电脑不上宽带，就好比酒肉都准备好了却在吃饭前当了和尚。

英语幽默笑话：

一：She Didn"t Say Anything

A mother and son were washing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the room Suddenly, there was a crash of breaking dishes, then complete silence

The girl looked at her father and said, “It was Mom”。

“How do you know” asked her father

“She didn"t say anything”

二：I Have Turned It Over

A woman said to her husband, “dear, look at our sheet! It"s too dirty Would you like to wash it now”

The man looked at the sheet and then thought for a while and then said, “I don"t think it"s necessary We can turn the sheet over Is that all right”

三、40 over Li lotus heart disease arises suddenly, is escorted to the hospital first aid The condition extremely too bad, the Li lotus felt oneself nearly all already died

In the rescue, the Li lotus has heard God's sound suddenly: "You cannot die, you also may live for 45 years 6 months 02 days, has the courage to go on living!"

Certainly, the result was the Li lotus miracle is revived After the body recovers, the Li lotus thought oneself also can live for more than 40 years, then □has anxiously is leaving the hospital, first repairs the face, then makes up the lip, then is the prosperous chest, finally is the thin abdomen, continuously has undergone 4 cosmetology surgeries altogether, then was called the specialized hair stylist to visit the service, changed has sent the color, has made the new tide hairstyle, the entire stature looked at □the young several years old

After last the reshaping surgery completes, the Li lotus then happily handled left the hospital the procedure, □thought actually the ambulance which rapidly 驶过 by 撞死 in the entrance

After the heaven, the Li lotus has been angry interrogates God: "Since you had said I also may live for 45 years, then you should not eat the word"

God awkwardly 耸了耸肩, replies: "Really is sorry, at that time, the vehicle hit when you I have not recognized am you"

英语笑话这里面有的，可以看看：

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